In Home Alone, it was used to aid in self-defense.
In Spider-Man, it gave Peter Parker his powers.
And in The Return of the King, it's yet another obstacle keeping Frodo from tossing the ring.
Nine times out of ten, I fully understand the role a spider plays in a given movie. But this? Well, this is that tenth time.
I don't even know what to truly make of Enemy, other then I loved every single minute of it. As routinely puzzling as it is, it's arguably the most consistently intriguing movie I've ever seen. In fact, it's so intense, my PS4 randomly ejected it halfway through and refused to accept it until almost twenty-four hours later. Maybe it was looking out for my fragile little mind, or maybe it's just really scared of spiders.
Jake Gyllenhaal plays Adam Bell, a nice-enough history teacher, not exactly living the dream. He has a decent job, a fairly hot girlfriend (whom he routinely bangs), but not much else. One day, after a co-worker rather awkwardly recommends it, Adam watches a movie and is floored by what he sees. Playing Bellhop #3 is a man who looks exactly like him. Intrigued and moderately bewildered (he's a pretty level-headed dude, well, for the most part), Adam decides to search this man out.
And that's all I'm going to tell you. See the f--king movie. Then you can read more. Otherwise, don't click that shit below. Or I'll dress up like you, head to your house and go have sex with your girlfriend. Unless, you're a chick. Then, well...I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to do.
In my defense of not understanding what the Hell happened in this movie, let me say that I had to watch it in three different sittings. The only reason I mention this, is I think something from the beginning directly stems from something at the end, but the gap was too wide for me to actually remember whether or not this is true. In fact, this theory isn't even mine, honestly. It's my sister's, or at least it was one of the things she came up with about 95 minutes I demanded that she end our phone call and watch Enemy IMMEDIATELY. (and being that she's the only member of my family I would say this to, of course that's just what she did)
Again, if you haven't seen it, please do. And soon. The Yays and Boos will be here when you get back. Actually, the Boos won't, as there was nothing about this movie I didn't like, just tons of shit I didn't get.
If you're reading this last line, and you're not a not-following-directions a-hole, then all I have left for you is one word:
Help.
In Spider-Man, it gave Peter Parker his powers.
And in The Return of the King, it's yet another obstacle keeping Frodo from tossing the ring.
Nine times out of ten, I fully understand the role a spider plays in a given movie. But this? Well, this is that tenth time.
Jake Gyllenhaal plays Adam Bell, a nice-enough history teacher, not exactly living the dream. He has a decent job, a fairly hot girlfriend (whom he routinely bangs), but not much else. One day, after a co-worker rather awkwardly recommends it, Adam watches a movie and is floored by what he sees. Playing Bellhop #3 is a man who looks exactly like him. Intrigued and moderately bewildered (he's a pretty level-headed dude, well, for the most part), Adam decides to search this man out.
And that's all I'm going to tell you. See the f--king movie. Then you can read more. Otherwise, don't click that shit below. Or I'll dress up like you, head to your house and go have sex with your girlfriend. Unless, you're a chick. Then, well...I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to do.
In my defense of not understanding what the Hell happened in this movie, let me say that I had to watch it in three different sittings. The only reason I mention this, is I think something from the beginning directly stems from something at the end, but the gap was too wide for me to actually remember whether or not this is true. In fact, this theory isn't even mine, honestly. It's my sister's, or at least it was one of the things she came up with about 95 minutes I demanded that she end our phone call and watch Enemy IMMEDIATELY. (and being that she's the only member of my family I would say this to, of course that's just what she did)
Again, if you haven't seen it, please do. And soon. The Yays and Boos will be here when you get back. Actually, the Boos won't, as there was nothing about this movie I didn't like, just tons of shit I didn't get.
Yaaaaaaaaaay!
- Jake Gyllenhaal. He's generally the man, but this might be my favorite role of his. Ever.
- The score. Holy shit is it intense.
- At times, I'm pretty sure this could pass as a silent film. We get some long stretches of silent intensity.
- I could go for something cheerful.
- So, um, their ladies are kind of similar looking, right?
- There is a five-plus minute stalk sequence that is utterly fantastic.
- When Adam finally Anthony, Anthony's plan is f--king brilliant. If I ever meet a guy who looks exactly like me (poor bastard), this is the ultimatum I'm giving him, too.
- What happened with the car. I think I said Oh, f--k aloud, maybe....seventeen times in a row.
- I loved how they revealed that Anthony's wife was pregnant. It made the seconds-earlier conversation 900% more important. Brilliant!
- And finally, the fact that this movie exists. I watch a lot of bullshit, and this film had me smiling like a complete f--king idiot for at least the next two days after I finished it.
Wait, whaaaaaat?
- Why's Adam such a dick in the sack?
- What the f--k was that 'lady' on the ceiling?
- You guys are going to meet in a hotel room? Huh?
- Mom. What the f--k lady? First, you ramble about blueberries, which bends my brain over a table, but then, then, you say that Adam should stop being a third-rate actor? I think my brain just fell out of my ass.
- The ring mark was understandable, and the accompanying reaction, but what about the other end of things? How's school? HOW'S SCHOOL!?! You can't just say shit like that, regardless of how hot and pregnant you are.
- And finally, the ending. I'm sure you smart people went, Oh, I see. But me? I just about went door-to-door in my neighborhood, asking people to punch me in the nuts. Because that would have made more sense to me at the time.
Help.