Sir, Are You Ill?

Some of you smarter types might read a classic novel to better educate yourself, or perhaps to simply make you a more well-rounded individu...

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It's Always A Little Pinchy In The Gooey Bag At First.

Austin Powers. Spider Man. Captain Jack Sparrow. All of the X-Men. Whoever the Hell Brendan Frasier played in The Mummy . The list goes on....

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Sounds Like Torture.

Look, I get it. I just took a new job seventy miles  away from my house. I'm not even sure what I'll be doing (or when I'll b...

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This Is Our Waterloo, Baby!

I've called the police just once in my life. Last New Year's Eve, somebody drove through my neighbor's fence, and I figured I...

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Sounds Like Torture.

Look, I get it. I just took a new job seventy miles  away from my house. I'm not even sure what I'll be doing (or when I'll b...

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Why Do They Always Pick On My Hat?

I don't know if it's because I've now set my summer movie-loving sights on the upcoming Expendables sequel, or simply because I...

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You Can't Solve All The World's Problems With A Shotgun.

Putting my son to sleep the other night, he asked me if I was going to bed, too. I told him that I was going to stay up and watch a movie. ...

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The Rabbit Is Correct.

Ten years is a long time to do anything. Especially considering many people have an attention span measured in syllabl-... and I've los...

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Is Murder Our New Religion?

The ballot is stronger than the bullet.   - Abraham Lincoln While I whole-heartedly agree with the 16th President of the United States,...

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Bitches, Man.

Many years ago, on a flight from Honolulu to Boston, I started to outline an idea for a movie. The idea was to create the most violent film...

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